Hi! I used to like taking actual songs and changing the lyrics to make them LotR or Hobbit themed. Here's one of them!
VeggieTales "The Pirates Who Don’t do Anything" to
"The Dead Dwarves Who Don’t do Anything"
CHORUS:
Thorin, Kili and Fili:
We are the dead dwarves who don’t do anything.
We just stay underground and lie around.
And if you ask us to do anything
We’ll just tell you:
Fili:
We don’t do anything!
Thorin: Well I’ve—
Never been to Gondor and I’ve
Never been to Mordor and I’ve
Never been killed in Arnor or Rohan.
And I’ve never been to Fangorn and I’ve
Never been to Nurn and I’ve
Only been through Mirkwood in the fall!
*CHORUS*
Kili: We don’t do anything. Well I’ve—
Never been to Moria and I’ve
Never been to Isengard and I’ve
Never haunted anyone ‘cause I never leave my grave. And I’ve
Never walked the red carpet and I’ve
Never been addressed as “prince” and I’ve
Only been through Mirkwood in the fall!
*CHORUS*
All: We don’t do anything!
Fili: Well I’ve—
Never plucked a Warg and I’m
Not too good at chess and I’ve
Never thrown my little brother up against the wall.
And I’ve never kissed an orc and I’ve
Never gotten scurvy and I’ve
Only been through Mirkwood in the fall!
Thorin: Huh? What are you talking about? What does a Warg and scurvy have to do with being dead?
Kili: Hey, that’s right. We’re supposed to sing about what dead guys can’t do anymore.
Thorin: And who’s ever kissed an orc? That’s just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?
Kili: I think you look like the Reaper.
Thorin: Huh? No I don’t!
Kili: Do too.
Thorin: Do not!
Kili: You’re creepin’ me out.
Thorin: That’s it! You’re dusting the tomb.
Kili: Says who?
Thorin: Says the king! That’s who!
Kili: Oh yeah? Very well, King Reaper! Hehehe!
Thorin: Grrrrrr!
Kili: Yikes!
Fili: And I’ve—
Never licked a spider and I’ve
Never sniffed a tire and I’ve
Never scratched a rune on a big round wooden door and I’ve
Never bathed in my life and I
Don’t look good in tutus.
Thorin: You just don’t get it.
All: And we’ve only been through Mirkwood in the fall! T
horin: Pass the jam! Who’s got the re-ghost control?
Fili: Here it is! K
ili: Time for World War Z!
Thorin: It’s definitely time for Walking Dead. K
ili: Ohh...I don’t like this show.
Fili: Hey look! I found a coin!